Staying Single or Getting Married? Time to Learn Monogram Etiquette
Wedding and registry trends may come and go, but the monogram—from elaborately scribed icons bordering on art to relatively austere single-letter imprints—has been a constant for generations. From Kimberly Whitman’s wonderful book, Monograms for the Home:
“In the nineteenth century, monograms were a sign of wealth.
Fast-forward to the fifties, and technology and the sewing machine increased the popularity of monograms, as it was easy to add a mark of personalization to everything. In a time when so much of what we have is mass-produced, a monogram can make something unique while adding a touch of artistry.”
While some traditional “rules” of monograms (the husband’s monogram should grace the barware, while the wife’s should grace the bed linens) seem charmingly antiquated, some guidelines do bear repeating. Here, Whitman shares protocol for every stage:
SINGLE FEMALE
First, last, middle; with the center initial larger than the flanking initials.
- Nicole Julia Schneider = nSj
MARRIED FEMALE
First, last, maiden; with the center initial larger than the flanking initials.
- Nicole Schneider Robertson = nRs
SINGLE OR MARRIED MALE
First, middle, last; with all initials being the same size.
- Edward Scott Robertson = ESR
SINGLE-LETTER MONOGRAMS
Monograms for unmarried people are also often just the single first-name initial, allowing for the addition of surname initials at a later time.
ENGAGED COUPLES
Traditionally it is not appropriate for an engaged couple to use the last name before their wedding ceremony. Instead, use a duogram* incorporating the couple’s first-name initials only. Once they are married, they may use the full combined initials.
MARRIED COUPLES
If you do want to create a duogram [1], the tradition of “ladies first” holds true. Use the wife’s first initial, the couple’s married last name in the center, and the husband’s first initial last.
- Nicole and Edward Robertson = nRe
[1] A duogram means only the first initial of two different people is used to create the design, as opposed to a monogram when only a single person’s initial(s) are used.
